Thoughts about my recent visit to the U.S.

Here I am again, writing out my thoughts as is my usual fashion whenever I am in the mood of writing my thoughts. I think I am doing this because I can verbalize my thoughts better in writing than in talking. 

I am back in Manila for more than 3 months now, having arrived from Texas, U.S.A. on June 24, after a 4-month visit to my brother and sister. Coming home at a time when it was very hot (but not as hot as in last May according to my daughter, which was the hottest ever in the Philippines that people said they had experienced), I could see the very stark contrast between the Philippines and the U.S. Sure, it was summer in the U.S. when I left, but if you were inside a building or a house (all buildings are equipped with centralized air conditioning systems and heaters), you would not be exposed to the heat of the sun, thus it would still be comfortable.

Another contrast that I saw was the environment between the 2 countries, Texas in particular. It was very clean, beautiful green trees along the streets, no pollution, no houseflies, cockroaches, or mosquitoes. When I arrived there in February, I was so ecstatic by the very clean environment. And food was cheap! Regardless of income, one can eat whatever one wants! In other words, rich and poor alike, they can eat the same kind of food. When I left the Philippines in February, I was 96 pounds (I was 106 when I was still working, but a year after I retired, I was down to 96), and when I came back home in June, I was 115 pounds. Now, I am slowly losing what I gained. I think the cause of my weight loss after retirement is the weather (the office is air conditioned, the house is not). '

And jobs were easy to find there – no age discrimination. If one has the proper working papers and job qualifications, he or she can easily find a very good job, hence he/she would be able to buy a house of his/her own.

I have heard all of these good things about America from many people many years before, but I also heard about the “not-so-good” things about the country. The not so good things are: First, you won’t have enough time for yourself and your family because of work; second, that one could not talk to people you want to talk to because they are busy, and you need to have an appointment with them if you want to see them. The third negative thing that made me think that America is not so good to live in is the tendency of people to become self-sufficient, and because of this, the feeling that they do not need God in their daily lives. Due to this feeling, there are only a few people who go to church. And last, Filipino children are more respectful toward their parents and elders. However, when these children go to America and are raised there, their behavior change and respect for elders diminish. These negative things are the things that were planted in my mind, that is why even if I have a brother in the US since 1980, I never thought of asking him to petition me.

I was able to go to 6 churches there. The attendance was very good. Almost all seats were occupied, unlike what I previously heard that in America, only a few attend church. I learned later that Texas is different from the other States. Most people in Texas are church goers, which I think is very good. We should not leave God out of our lives. Pastors preached very good messages. The praise and worship in all the churches I attended are lively and very spiritual. The members are very friendly. I even met people (Americans and Hispanics) who are dedicated Christians!

I experienced 3 seasons in the U.S. – 3 weeks of winter, 3 months of spring, and 2 weeks of summer. I was able to visit Las Vegas, Louisiana, San Antonio (Remember The Alamo), Dallas where JFK was assassinated, NASA, and a few other places.

The climate there was so good, that even when one had already worked all day, when one gets home from work, she would still have the energy to do some more at home. Saturdays and Sundays are free which one can spend with one’s family. This is just the opposite of what some people have told me before, that you won’t have enough time for your family.

My sister is an epitome of cleanliness and orderliness. But because of the very clean environment, it was not necessary to clean the house every day. We vacuum the carpets and dust the furniture only every other week, sweep the floors that are not carpeted once a week only. This is not so here in the Philippines. One has to clean the house and dust the furniture every day. In fact, if one has to be meticulous, and does not want to see a speck of dust at home, one has to sweep the floor and dust the furniture twice a day even if one is living in a subdivision. Here, naguumpisa pa lang akong gumawa sa bahay, tumutulo na ang pawis ko, after a little while, nangigitata na, at pagod na.

When I was in Texas for 2 months already, a friend asked whether I missed my family, to which I replied “not yet”, which is what I really felt at that time. But one week before my scheduled departure, I was ready to come home, a little excited to go back home to my family.

My sister who has been in the U.S. for almost 4 years now is working as a nurse in Texas. She works 40 hours a week, Monday to Friday. She drives her car to Park and Ride, where she parks her car and gets a bus to her work, then comes back by bus also and drives her car back home. When she arrived in the U.S., she did not know how to drive. While she was still in the Philippines, my eldest daughter, knowing my sister’s plan of going to the U.S., offered to teach her how to drive, but she said no, she would not be able to learn, because she is a nervous person. In her first year in the U.S., she worked in a hospital in Cleveland, Ohio, but after a year, she decided to move to Texas. The reason for this decision is to be near family (her son and our brother) and friends, plus the fact that the climate and working conditions in Texas are far better.

Maybe the people who emphasize the negative things in America are those who don’t have their family there, which is understandable, or they are the sociable type, whose day will not be complete without talking to a friend. But the Filipinos I talked to while I was there have only good things to say about staying in the U.S., maybe because they have their families with them. A long time friend who has been in the U.S. for more than 20 years said that when she graduated from college in the Philippines, she had a very strong feeling that the Philippines was not for her. Now, she is happy and comfortable in America.

In summation, I liked everything I saw and experienced in the U.S., in Texas in particular. Had I gone there 20 years ago and saw for myself what I saw during the 4 months I stayed there, I would have convinced my brother to petition me and I would have been able to get a good job suited to my qualifications, and my family would have been able to follow later. The fact that it would be difficult to talk to people does not bother me at all. I think this is because I am not a people person. Maybe those who know me would understand what I mean. I am always the silent one in a group. Being a loner, I love solitude most of the time. Attending a social gathering once every six months or once a year is good enough for me. In fact, I would never mind having no social life at all. Maybe that is the precise reason why I love my last assignment in my job – as cashier and backroom support, working on the computer the whole day in the office.

I thank God He let me see the positive side of America which is Texas. Had I stayed in another State, I would have a negative perspective, and I would have told my family and friends that it is not good to stay there permanently, and I would have not been excited to be staying there. But that is not so, until now, I am of the opinion that the advantages of living in the U.S. outweigh the disadvantages, that is, if your family is with you.

P.S.

I am aware that not everybody will agree with me that it is better to live in America than in the Philippines. Those who are rich, who can afford to have at least 2 househelps (kasambahay), who can afford to buy at least 2 brand new cars, who can afford and not mind a P10,000 or more monthly electric bill, whose monthly salary is at least P200,000, would prefer to live in the Philippines.

Years before, my daughters kept asking me, why did I not ask my brother to petition me, why was I just content staying here? Well, their questions did not bother me at all. I was simply contented with my life here, we have a house, we were able to make both ends meet, although it was a financial struggle, we were able to send them to college and finish their studies. But that was before I saw for myself what America was like. Back then, I did not know what I was missing. Now, I understand why so many Filipinos migrate to America. Hearing about something is quite different than when you yourself have seen it with your own eyes and have experienced it yourself.