MY BROTHER DAVID

My brother David De Jesus – Dave to his own family and friends, and Bebet to our parents and us siblings - went to be with the Lord more than five months ago.  Although I expected that he would soon be gone, still it was sad when that day came. 

A boss of mine once said that no siblings in a family would have the same personality or temperament.  So if a family has six siblings, it follows that there would be six different temperaments. I find that very true.  In my family of origin, we are six siblings, so six kinds of temperaments existed in our house. One sibling is shy, another is outspoken, another is friendly, another gets easily angry, etc.

Although Bebet may not be able to express himself well, I would consider him as a bit of an extrovert because he enjoyed being with people, and loved meeting new friends.  However, because of his type of temperament and behavior, people who were not familiar with him may regard him as uncouth.  But once they get to know him well, they would easily forgive his lack of good manners, lack of grace, and lack of refinement.  And this is because they would see him as someone who worked very hard.  Aside from being hardworking, he was also very helpful.  Maybe, these are the traits that made his in-laws and his friends love him!  His cheerful personality may be one reason that in spite of his illness, he still could smile and be friendly.   

Among us siblings, it was me that Bebet would contact the most.  We would reminisce our childhood memories.  I think it was because being the eldest, I was the one who could remember many details of our childhood.  Aside from our childhood memories, he would talk about politics in America and in the Philippines.  I think he liked to talk with me the most because I would listen to everything that he would say.  One of the qualities of an introvert (me) is that of being a good listener.  However, although I am a good listener, that didn’t mean that I would agree with everything a person says. 

Among us siblings, it was Bebet who was well-known among the relatives on our mother’s side of the family.  The Dela Cruz family.  He enjoyed visiting our relatives.  In every Dela Cruz reunion in the Philippines, our relatives would ask about him, saying that he was a constant visitor in their homes when Bebet was still in the Philippines.

As a hardworking man, Bebet showed his children by his example that it was very important to work hard to survive and succeed in this competitive world.  He was also a very helpful person.  It would seem that he didn’t know how to say “No” whenever someone asked for his help, even though he needed to do other things and was already tired.  I think helping others gave him satisfaction and purpose.  Hopefully, his legacy of hard work and helping others have been instilled in his children.

In some of our conversations on video calls when he was still in his 60’s, Bebet would tell me  that he might not reach the age of 70, but last year, when he was already 73, he said that God had already given him a bonus of three years. However, late last year, Bebet told me that he was already very weak - he could just walk a few steps, and he would sit because he would get tired already.  For the first time, he expressed giving up on life.  He was very weak, tired and in pain.  

In March of this year, when his daughter Esther had obtained her USA immigrant visa, he said he might live some more years, but not beyond five years.  He asked me to get some malunggay and alugbati leaves for Esther to bring when she goes to USA.  Esther also bought some seeds to bring with her when she flies to USA.  Bebet said he would plant them.  In my mind, why would he do that?  He was already very weak.  But Bebet was just like that.  He was an active person.  He would stretch himself to the limit.  I now think that on April 17 when he breathed his last, he tried to do something that aggravated his already very weak condition.  Maybe he did not ask for assistance when he needed to go to the bathroom.  Sadly, he passed away one week before Esther’s scheduled flight to USA.

It’s sad to think that Bebet had hoped to live more years, but was not able to.  He wanted very much to see his youngest daughter succeed in her career, and to live more years to be with his family.  

My brother had suffered a lot during his last years on earth, not only physically but also emotionally because of his illness.  Physically, because he was already very weak.  Emotionally, because being a very active person as well as being sociable, he wanted to do many things and visit friends, but could not. I thank God because He had a better plan for him.  God wanted him to rest from his pain and suffering.  Bebet is now happy in the presence of our Lord Jesus, and is free from sickness, free from pain and free from physical suffering. 

Romans 8:18 - For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory which shall be revealed in us.